Simplify

Posted on 03.18.08 in Faith Marriage Parenthood and there are 12 comments.

Simplify.

This is something I’ve been trying to do for about a year now. It hasn’t been easy.

I don’t want to simplify. I want my stuff. I want my hobbies. I want it all.

But I’m Desperate

I’m desperate to follow Jesus better. I’m desperate to love Jimmy well. I’m desperate to be the best mother I can be.

But all my “stuff” gets in the way.

So, I’m simplifying. I don’t play soccer anymore. I just resigned from my very last web design client. No has become my default answer.

I want to do a few things and do them exceedingly well. Everything I do either moves me closer to my goals or pushes me farther away. I don’t think there’s really a middle ground, even though I like to think there is.

Thoreau said, “As if killing time doesn’t injure eternity.”

I don’t want to waste my time. I want every task to count. Every second to make me a better follower of Jesus, lover of my husband or mother to my children.

So, I’m simplifying. I’m saying no. I’m delegating. I’m throwing things away.

It’s been hard, but it’s been good.

So, what about you? Do you have too much on your plate, too? How are you trying to simplify (your stuff or your life)?

The Comments:

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I do want to simplify. Definitely. I don’t know where to start. I’m not organized. I’m not very good at prioritizing or deciding what stays and what goes.

My wife is much better at this than I am, but she frightens me a bit because she’ll just toss everything. She has a “if you haven’t used or needed it for over a year, you need to get rid of it” mindset. Me, I’m just sure that a week after throwing something out, I’ll find the perfect use for it, and wish I had it back.

With spring starting to bloom around here, the “spring cleaning” impulse is starting to grow, even in me. Seems like a good time to simplify.

We are simplifying everything in our life. We have turned off all cable. It wastes our time to watch TV and tune out to each other, so we cut it. We are purging our home like crazy. We are minimizing our possessions. We are saying “no” more and only “yes” when it’s important to us or others. We are limiting trips to other’s homes. We still visit, but we finally had to tell family, “enough, we can’t come a few times a month”. We are simplifying holidays by cutting down on gifts, lessening travel and just relaxing and enjoying the MEANING of the holiday. We are clearing our minds of clutter. We are clearing our bodies of clutter by changing our eating habits. Life is just getting more simple around here. ("Simple" being a relative term since we DO have two children under the age of 3.)

Simplifying is something that is a constant and continuous process for me.  As life changes, “simple” means different things.  I think it is worth the effort, though. 

I like the way you said that ‘No’ is your new default answer.  This is such an important step!  For a long time, it was my default; then, I started feeling like I deserved to allow myself to say ‘Yes’ more.  And I did.  Life became paniced and stressful, until I realized that I needed to change that default back to ‘No.’

As far as obligations, my life is pretty simple at the moment.

But, I’m really unorganized.  One thing I need to do is purge my life of meaningless stuff.

I’d also like to simplify my decision making process and not over analyze everything until the absolute death.

my life seems simple, but seems to get in the way of everything of really want to do.  It is amazing how much time is wasted.

Kat - this post is exactly why your blog is becoming one of my new favorites. As I read it I just kept thinking, “Yes!!”

Just a couple of weeks ago I came to a similar conclusion, and wrote about it here if you have any interest. Basically, I desperately needed balance in my life, but realized: balance requires sacrifice.

Thanks for a great post!

Great thoughts.  So glad that you have learned this so young.  I am just now trying to get that.  To be quiet, to listen and just stop.  The Lord says we should “live a quiet life and work with our hands.” Love that.
Thank you....Barb

The lovely Katherine and I have been doing this, albeit very slowly.  I am a packrat, and its tough for me, especially with lumber and other materials I might use for a job around the house.

On the soccer.  I drove kids around, went to PTA meetings, recitals, games, etc for 20 years.  At one point I decided to play “old-fart baseball” as an outlet for daddy. 

It made me a happier person, and I found a love of the game that I had lost since leaving high school.  I tore a tendon in my elbow my senior year and lost my scholarship.  But i never stopped wanting to play.

I still play baseball every thursday night.  And I do it because its important to me.  My wife likes to watch the games, my kids think its funny to watch old guys run around slow.  Its a great family outing. 

That said, I agree there are times when I felt God had me give something up for a season.  But I also think it important for us to do something, no matter how small, for ourselves.  My wife’s is working out. Those 2 hours are her lifeblood, and we all like her better when she does it. ;>)

This does not always fit in with the idea of self-sacrifice.  I guess we just have to sensitive to God’s leading.

You still have to do some things for yourself. Feed your passions. God loves to see His children using the gifts He has so generiously provided.

Kat,
Getting rid of good to make room for the best?  Love it.

I seem to be in a constant state of overload.  I need to learn to trust that God will let me know what I need to let go.

Welllll ... in a sense, this is why I started writing my blog at: http://www.harryoffutt.com/focus

One of my discoveries is that the reason we can’t do the things that we used to do well is that we slowly let the environment that supports those things erode, disappear, or get cluttered beyond usefulness.  The culprit isn’t just time, there’s just not enough attention paid to the things that support the environment in which the good activities thrive!

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