A Word of Thanks and My Plan of Action

Posted on 07.01.08 in Parenthood and there are 13 comments.

You all are incredible. Thank you so much for your encouragement and words of wisdom yesterday.

It’s so nice to know I’m not the only one who feels like this.

Well, being a task oriented sort of person, I have (with Jimmy’s encouragement and help) come up with a plan of action to keep my sanity and stay refreshed during this season of life. Here are a few of the things we’re going to do:

1. Rest - Even though the girls don’t nap, they will have “rest” time each day. We’d sort of implemented this during an earlier meltdown a week ago, but I haven’t been consistent with it.

2. Plan - On Sunday afternoons, Jimmy will watch the kids and I’ll head to the coffee shop to plan for the next week and work on the final web project I’m finishing up. (We used to do this but haven’t done it for awhile. It’s good time to start it again.)

3. Push ups - 100 push ups a day. (Sounds random, but exercise is very important to me.) I’ve been doing this for a few days now and it’s been a great way for me to sneak in exercise throughout the day (because, unlike you, I cannot do 100 push ups at one time. I have to do them in little tiny increments.) I really feel it by the end of the day, but I don’t really sweat, which is good, because showers are not always an option.

4. Dive In - We’ve been swimming a lot this summer and the worst part of swimming is always getting in the water. I loathe leaving my nice cozy towel and I shiver and chant “it’s cold...it’s cold...it’s cold...” until I just suck it up and dunk myself. Once I do that, everything is fine and I have a great time.

I think I need to do the same with this season of Mommyhood. I need to let go of my cozy selfish ambitions and dive into this amazing, wonderful and fleeting time with my kids.

What about you? What do you do to stay refreshed during the crazy seasons of life?

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Hey Kat
I think I told you on twitter, but my sister does that rest time thing and it really helps her a lot.  When I visit, it’s so cute to hear the girls reading to each other or making up stories in their room.  I think they need the time as well..not just her.  Especially the middle daughter...she needs alone time to refresh.

I think the exercise is key, too.  I find when I get stressed or overwhelmed that a change of scenery helps....it’s not so easy with kids but I guess would the same as a walk to the park. 

anyone else craving a coke now?

Kat-

I just felt to comment tonight...I just posted a mommy myth on my blog that is somewhat appropriate to your “End of Me” post....and believe me, I empathize completely...I am one of those people that have way too much on my plate...I do own a business...I’m a homeschooling stay-at-home mom...and that’s just the beginning.  I think our kids are at similar stages, and that in and of itself can be difficult. 

We have Rest Time at my house...A MUST!  I have also realized that if I get the kids “out” to the beach (we have beaches where I live) or the pool, or some kind of out side activity...they tend to give me more time w/ less whine (ing). 

I really like the Sunday planning at the coffee shop idea...I’m gonna try that one!

PS
Owning the business...isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, when something happens with the biz and you can’t attend your daughter’s soccer game or school party...now the work at home, manage my own schedule...that works for me, and that’s what I am trying to get to eventually. 

Let us know how the plan works!

I think that you are completely normal, and doing such a great job! It is so evident how much you love your children, and that is the most important thing in parenting I think.

Your plan of action sounds great though.  Rest time works at my house.  And it sounds like the Sunday time for you has worked really good.  For me, it’s always good to step back and reevaluate when life starts spinning too quickly, and I begin spinning with it.

I had all intentions of posting yesterday, but being a busy mommy ran out of time! 

I love that you made a plan of action, planning is right up my alley.

I try to get up early to have a little time before myself before the kids awake, that way I don’t feel attacked by them before my day starts. 

I also try to escape with a book right before bed.  That allows me to get my mind off of things.  I might just read five minutes, but five minutes allow me to step away before my minds drift off to sleep!

Good plan Kat.  The rest times will be good for the mommy.  My wife does 200 crunches and walks 2 miles.  She is a different person when she doesn’t do that.

I happened upon an interesting blog this morning, thought you might like to check it out. Timely music info on there.

http://virtuealert.blogspot.com/2008/06/overnight-success-of-katy-perrys-single.html

<<I need to let go of my cozy selfish ambitions and dive into this amazing, wonderful and fleeting time with my kids.>>

Yes. Me too.

Exercise is huge for me too.  Travis puts London to bed a few times a week so that I can head off to the gym to expel the frustration of the day.  I also do a lot of parks with London because it is time for him to run around and me to just be quite and enjoy the outdoors.

I love you!  i prayed for you today while I was working out.  I hope that you felt HIs Hug.

Those are really great ideas, Kat!  When I feel stressed, I usually just lie down on the bed and listen to some of my favorite music, or I read a book.  Naps are also good. 

And you don’t sweat doing push-ups? I’m so jealous!  I bet I could watch you do push-ups and start sweating.

First, we have rest time at our house too. My 2 year old (3 on Tuesday) has decided he doesn’t need a nap anymore. Well, Mommy needs him to nap for sanity sake so we have “you don’t have to sleep, but you can’t come out of your room until I come get you” time. It works great. He almost always, woo hoo, happens to fall asleep during that time. So, it’s a win-win.

We also have started “diving in” around here. We have finally figured out what’s “wrong” with our 5 month old (praise God) and have a full evaluation on Thursday. Through that we have discovered why we have had 2 years of hard times with our older son. Our younger son painted the picture so we could see the entire situation with both boys. So our older son will be evaluated for the same issues and also for speech therapy needs. He also has tons of food allergies and we are going organic, and, and, and, and, “oh I give up. Time to just dive in and go for it full throttle.” It hurts less, is over with faster and you can get on to the good parts of life.

Okay, So I am going to comment on this post and the End of Me post in one big comment that is liable to raise some eyebrows.  I understand to the degree possible (seeing as I only have 1 super active almost walking almost 8 month old baby) the stress of lack of time.  While he is awake I virtually do no chores.  I play with him, watch him, read to him, feed him, change his diapers, etc.  During his naps, I try to get all the chores around the house done that is possible to do in the limited time.  If I have any extra time, that is my bonus time to work on my book.  Hence I have not blogged since May 30th. 

However, here is the eyebrow rasing section.  Hold onto your chairs folks.  I don’t think there is anything wrong with wanting to run businesses or exercise or do the many things you want to do while you are a mom.  If you look at Proverbs 31, the “ideal” woman brings in income for her household and is praised for that in the bible.  She has wisdom in managing her household.  I have never in the Bible read where it says the woman should be a stay at home mom that is not allowed in any way shape or form to bring in income for her household.  In fact, I believe part of the uniqueness of you that God created is the desires and drives that make you - you.  Simply put, at some point there are tons of things I would like to do.  I would like to rock climb more often, have all the time in the world to finish my book faster, travel, etc.  Those things cost money and take time that I don’t have.  So I prioritize.  I don’t blog anymore so I can write my book in those brief moments I have to myself.  Does that make me unChristian or a “bad” mom?  I think NOT. 

When my husband comes home, we spend our time together with our baby until he is in bed and then we spend our time together. 
So, yes I agree it is frustrating not to be able to pursue everything, but I do not think it is wrong to have pursuits, dreams, or desires.  Someone please show me a verse that defines a stay at home mom who is not allowed to do these things.  And, what are the implications for Christian moms all over the world who are not blessed with the materials or time that we have?  To me, this is American culture/expectations projecting our version of an “American Christian stay at home” mom.  So I guess my point is to say, I’m there with ya but I don’t agree with some of the other commenters that you should give up these desires or dreams.  Jesus took time away from the crowds to refill.  God created the Sabbath.  Moms need a break.  I’m glad you have a plan - it sounds like a good one! 

BTW - so I’m guessing you are able to do your housework while the kids are awake?  My little guy wouldn’t stay in the laundry basket while I did stuff.  He just knocked it over and crawled out.  At 6 months…

A. Snodgrass,
I completely agree. I think it’s really important that we retain our hopes and dreams. So far my plan has been working well and I’ve been having a great week!

What kind of book are you writing?

A children’s mystery book.  It’s also funny.

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